Guys can I start this thing off with a quick confession? Yes? Ok, great. I haven't really been feeling this season. I was having this conversation with a few girlfriends this weekend, and we all seemed to be on the same page. We absolutely adore Rachel and are rooting for her 100 percent. But the season has been a bit of a snoozefest! We were flummoxed at first as to why that was, but we came to the realization it's because Rachel is too smart. She makes logical, sound decisions when it comes to finding love, she doesn't tolerate BS and she is never afraid to speak her mind or confront her uncertainties. She is an awesome role model for young girls and other women looking for the same things in life, but does it make for great reality television? Not quite.
Ok, phew, I already feel better getting that off my chest! Now, it's been a while since we've seen a normal episode with Rachel given that last week there was no show and the week before that we had a two-night, four-hour show where Rachel had to deal with the Kenny/Lee kerfuffle and then sent the superbly talented dancer and Rubik's cube solver Alex packing. We realized that meant we only had six dudes and 1 week left before hometowns, and we knew virtually nothing about two of the guys she had left: Matt and Adam. Ok, now you are all caught up, let's move on to Geneva!
"This week, I'm giving out a rose saying please take me home and welcome me into your family... that's huge!"
See, that right there is exactly the type of logical thought process and situational awareness that makes us bow down to Queen Rachel. She is always acknowledging how her actions are affecting those around her, and what the circumstances mean for all involved. We kick off this monumental week with a few contemplative b-roll shots of Rachel strolling around gorgeous Geneva talking about the importance of her decisions this week, and what she is looking to get from all the guys this week to be able to make those decisions. The boys are also taking in their new surroundings, high-fiving and shoulder clapping down the streets before pile diving into the bed back in the hotel. Rachel enters the suite looking angelic according to Adam and immediately tells her remaining men that things will be different this week. Instead of a rose ceremony, she will go on three one-on-one dates and one group date with the other three dudes, and roses will either be given out... or they won't. Even thought Matt and Adam still have never had a one-on-one date this far into the process, she invites Bryan out to enjoy a high-end luxury date. Also, can I just say one more time how mature and brave Rachel is? I mean have we ever seen a Bachelor/Bachelorette in the past deliver the date cards in person and have to actually confront the crestfallen faces of her dejected suitors and sit in the awkward while waiting for her one-on-one date to get dressed? Nope.
Rachel takes Bryan outside to show him their mode of transportation for the day, which is just a casual Bentley. He is appropriately giddy at the thought of driving that car and we can see Rachel's genuine joy at his reaction, since we know she enjoys "treating her man every once in a while." The next stop is to Breitling to shop for matching his and her watches (and for some serious making out in public), because what's a trip to Geneva without dropping several grand on timepieces? Bryan is so #blessed when he's with Rachel, and Rachel admits to being totally lost in the moment when she's with Bryan. I guess that explains why she allows him to attack her face very publicly on every date. Poor watch man, we feel your pain. At least we've had a TV separating us each week. You dealt with those loud, smacking kisses IRL. You're the real hero of this week Breitling man! Buuuut you can't deny that these two in-your-face lovebirds have real chemistry. It's written all over Rachel's giddy, smiling face every time he's around. The rest of the date is a compilation of the various places Rachel and Bryan can find to make out in Geneva including a very picturesque tulip field, followed by a dinner date where Rachel and Bryan discuss their last relationships and Bryan admits that his last girlfriend dumped him immediately after spending time with his mother. Rachel, sweets, when a man tells you that mama bear is difficult, you RUN! Alas, she does not heed my advice and gives him a rose.
Back home, we see our boys awaiting the next date card, which is given to Dean. Adam looks ready to blow a gasket, as he desperately wants his moment to "be the broom that sweeps Rachel off her feet," while Dean looks nauseous at the thought of the date with Rachel. Little did I know, I'd soon be feeling the very same feels after having to watch their cringe-worthy date. Dean has been a favorite of mine since the beginning, and I thought he was a front-runner for Rachel too, despite the age difference... until this date where he showed just how young he is. After donning their Sunday best and attending church in the vieille ville (old town) section of Geneva, babyface and Rachel sit down to chat cafe style, and you can visibly see that Dean can't get out of his own head on this date. She practically begs him to open up to her and to use the time to get to know her better, and he chooses to ask her if she believes in the tooth fairy... yep, real question. She tells him again that she needs to see a more serious side of him in order to see their relationship progress, but when she asks him to tell her his feelings, he asks her what her favorite dinosaur is and tells her she is pretty. He literally can't stop it with the bad jokes and the nervous giggles. Could it be that Dean doesn't want to take Rachel home? Thankfully, the evening portion gets better, as Dean finally opens up to her and explains his nerves surrounding hometowns. "My family is not the family you're going to want to see," he says. He goes on to say that after his mom passed away, things with his dad were really strained, and they never seemed to get over it; his dad couldn't flip the switch and be what 15-year-old Dean needed: mom and dad. "He isn't a person who has any bearing on my emotional experience I guess you could say," Dean elaborates. But Rachel reassures him with a rose and tells him she isn't looking for a family just like hers and that she just wants to meet the people who made him the amazing individual he is. Dean seems to have a visible weight lifted off of him thinking that Rachel "is open to the idea of a dysfunctional, patriarchal family."
*Also quick shout out to the wardrobe department because Rachel's ensembles this episode are on point! That little cape number and stiletto booties on Dean's date, plus the coat with the cropped sweater on the group date?? YASSS!*
Next up is sexy salt and peppa, aka Peter. Even though Peter hasn't had a one-on-one since the first episode (yes, he got the first one-on-one date and the last- IRONY!) Rachel admits that he has kept her interest the entire time, and she always finds herself wanting more Peter. They enjoy a romantic dog sled ride and a roll in zee snow as they bond over their shared experiences with this franchise. Peter admits that there have been dark days when he wasn't sure he wanted to stay, which was hard for Rachel to hear and made her think back to her dark days with Nick, but she admits that she is very glad he pushed through and stayed. Honestly, the rest of the date is pretty much about this, with a little side note of Peter telling Rachel about his last breakup where he left a girl that he loved but didn't think he loved her enough to make the ultimate commitment. She asks him if he makes it to the end, and he isn't feeling it, would he propose and he tells her straight up no. That leaves her with some nerves at the idea of picturing herself atop a cliff, with no one down on bended knee. But, she takes a chance and gives him a rose.
Lastly we have the group date. A very nervous Matt, ball of emotions Adam and hard-to-read Eric head off to greet Rachel where she takes them aboard her boat heading for a Château in France, because, it's Europe and day trips involve crossing borders. Rachel uses the boat ride to explain to the cameras (aka us) where she stands with each of these three valiant suitors. Which is good since we've seen next to nothing of her relationship with two of them. Adam is apparently someone she always has fun with and who takes advantage of every minute they have together; Eric is someone that she started off on a great foot with, but they've had some bumps in their relationship. Yet, the one-on-one in Copenhagen was amazing and took their relationship to another level; and Matt is someone she has a soft spot for, because he's a good, down to earth guy whom she has very real conversations with. Unfortunately, down-to-earth Matt isn't good enough as he is the first one she sends packing after crying through his entire talk to her. He takes it in a very stoic manner, and our final impression of Matt is that we still don't know Matt. C'est la vie! In something of a twist, Eric reveals that he has never brought a girl home and that definitely gives Rachel pause. The gritty details of his family's life in Baltimore, his Uncle being in jail for 50 years and numerous family members selling drugs on the street, however, do not seem to elicit much reaction. "Seeing healthy relationships isn't normal for me," Eric confides. He tells her no one has ever taken care of him, and that's why he's here. He wants -- no needs -- someone who will take care of him. In the end, poor strung-out, wound-way-too-tight Adam is sent home, like we all saw coming and he does not take it super well as he tells the cameras in the getaway car that Rachel "made a huge mistake, massive mistake." We feel for Adam and Matt for sure, but all we can think about are those previews for next week: getting to meet Dean's dysfunctional family and seeing how Eric's first experience with bringing a girl home goes!
Until next week, my loves!