Guys, can I be real with you and just say now how disappointed I was with this week's episode? It was such a yawn! First of all, the episode was only an hour since the producers have decided for some strange reason to give us a three hour episode next week. Because you know, we don't need to sleep or anything and we have all the time in the world to dedicate to this show. We didn't cover all that much ground this week, and everything seemed to be drawn out and over emphasized. But, let's do this thing right and start from the beginning...
Coming face to face with Andi: Since every episode this season has to end on a "cliffhanger," we picked up where we left off last week, with Andi Dorfman showing up at Nick's door. If you're like me and never saw Andi's season, you probably weren't super interested in this "drama for the sake of drama" interruption from our regularly scheduled programming. Granted this five minutes of air time is the only thing I know about Andi, but I can already tell he'll be way better off with any of the remaining women (yes, even you Corinne!) than he would with Andi. Nick tells her she is the last person he expected to see considering "the last time [she] broke down [his] door, [she] dumped [him] on national television." Andi laughs and jokes about how it has all come full circle since he is now the one dumping 29 women. "Maybe 30," Nick shockingly says, causing Andi to ask him if he sees himself not winding up with anyone. To his credit, Nick says "I'm not going to propose to a woman just because she's the last one standing," and my respect for Nick increases ten fold. But Nick assuages our fears that he will break all these poor girls' hearts and says that "after speaking with Andi, I've never felt more sure that this is going to work."
The Rose Ceremony: While Nick is chatting with Andi over whiskey and getting unsolicited fantasy suite advice from the woman who dumped him right after his own night in the fantasy suite (uhh, awkward much?), Chris Harrison is escorting our four lovely ladies onto a Brooklyn rooftop where they will stand in silence shivering and waiting for Nick to join them and hand out those three coveted roses. They each tell the camera how nervous they are, and how devastated they would be to go home tonight after they had such a great time introducing Nick to their families. Vanessa seems the most shaken up as she cries, and questions whether she can keep going not knowing where Nick's head is, and how he is feeling about the other women. Eventually Nick emerges, looking mighty fine in an all black tux we might add, with a grave expression on his face. Roses are doled out to Raven, Rachel and..... Vanessa. Which of course means we must say goodbye to this season's hate-to-love-her girl, Corinne, who immediately starts ugly crying. I may be in the minority here, but I was so ready for this girl to go home! I was over her spoiled ways after the hometown date where her idea of showing Nick a day in the life of Corinne was to take him on an $8,000 shopping spree and her dad questioned whether Nick could make enough money to give his princess the lifestyle she's become accustomed to. But I have to admit, my heart did break for her a bit seeing how genuinely sad she was to say goodbye to Nick and how she immediately blamed herself for the demise of their relationship. I hope Raquel's cheese pasta and cucumber slices will bring you some comfort in the coming weeks, love!
Finland: The remaining three women -- Vanessa, Rachel (does she even really count as "remaining" since we know she is the next Bachelorette already??) and Raven -- pack their bags and head to Lapland, Finland for a week of snowy dates and hot nights in the fantasy suite with Nick! First up is Raven, whom Nick tells us that his relationship with "is like a choose your own adventure book." The two share a helicopter ride and some kisses while Raven's voice over tells us that she felt like she missed an opportunity to tell Nick she loves him at the hometown date, and that she vowed to herself that if he kept her through this rose ceremony, she would tell him she loved him. Raven and Nick wind up in a dive-y looking bar where they play darts and once again prove that they are just the cutest and seem to have genuine chemistry. Then, we settle in for a loooong conversation that will occupy the rest of the episode about Raven's fears and nerves about the fantasy suite and her hesitation to tell Nick she loves him. Nick asks her where the hesitation comes from, and she explains that her fear stems from the fact that she has never said "I love you" to any boy before because she never felt safe saying it, and that in her last relationship, her ex would only say it to her when he was drunk -- RED FLAG GIRL! Eventually, with the aid of many sips of wine, Raven is able to tell a very relieved Nick that she the feelings that she has for him are deeper than anything she felt for her ex and that she does love him. And we agree with Nick -- it has to be one of the best declarations of love ever! But then sweet little Raven leaves us with one more shocker... she's only been intimate with one person before and that he was never able to fully bring her where she needed to go, if you can read between my lines there.... No pressure Nick! We end the episode with turtleneck-clad Nick and Raven giggling and canoodling next to each other in bed.
So, while this week was a bit of a snooze fest, let's not despair, because next week we are going to be given a beautiful, beautiful gift. Yes, we see the remaining two fantasy suite dates (and find out whether Raven's date had a satisfying end), but most importantly.... next week is the WOMEN TELL ALL!!! Is anyone else insanely excited to reconnect with dolphin girl?? Alexis, babe, we have missed you and your wacky ways! Bring on the confessions and cat fights, please!!